that facebook spam.

that facebook spam.
that facebook spam!

i do not like you, facebook spam.
i will not like you, facebook spam!

i do not like you selling apps.
nor your online game of craps.
i do not like your e-card memes.
i hate social media consulting teams!
i will not like you, facebook spam!

i do not like you, target ads.
i won’t click on your like-me fads!
i will not like these partisan trolls!
not those group-ons for pasta bowls.

i cannot stand the contrived noise.
i will not like you, bonobo corduroys!
i do not like you, facebook spam.
i will not like you, facebook spam!

i do not like getting tagged in posts.
i won’t like you either, sports radio talk show hosts!

oh, facebook – facebook, don’t you know?
i like *my people* and not promoted crow!

not the default “top stories” sort order.
not guy-who-won’t-just-walk-into-mordor.
i will not like that science guy;
not another post from george takei!
i do not like you, facebook spam.
i will not like you, facebook spam!

not on a train, not in a tree!
not in a car, facebook, let me be!

i do not like them on my phone.
i do not like them when i am home.
i do not like them on iPad.
i will not like them — they are so bad!

will nothing end these pleas for likes?
they bum me out like stolen bikes!

of course, of course, if we’re not paying,
we are the product.
i hate this game. i hate these players.

i will not like you, facebook spam.
deep down i know that you’re just a scam.

who forthwith pounced upon the luckless one

nyt | Pittsburgh Brokers to Wear Their Straw Hats Until Oct 1:

“PITTSBURGH, Sept. 15. — The customary hilarious destruction of straw hats on Sept. 15 on the floor of the Pittsburgh Stock Exchange was missing today. Tradition has set that as the date for men to bid farewell to the Summer hat and always a big percentage of the Stock Exchange members absentmindedly appeared on this day with their old straws. This was a signal for a chorus of wild whoops on the part of other brokers, who forthwith pounced upon the luckless one.

But the Floor Committee of the Exchange defied tradition today and ruled against observances of the “straw hat” day. The committee decided by a unanimous vote that “straw hats may be worn with all the propriety and dignity attached thereto until and including Oct. 1.””

all others are error

“There are those who view the world in an easygoing manner, thinking that some people prefer their steak rare, and others well done, and that it’s simply a matter of taste. But it is not a matter of taste. Harsh and fascistic as it may sound, there is in truth only one perfect degree of doneness. All others are error, at least in those who, like us, agree that steak should be tasty, tender, and juicy.

Consider the purplish crimson stripe in the very center. This part of the meat is raised to a temperature of only 90°F by the time it comes off the grill; it is in essence raw — without much flavor and without any juice. Some diners may prefer their entire steak to taste and feel like beef sashimi, perhaps seared on the outside. Cooking does not really start until the meat is heated to beyond 100°F, before this point, meat will be gel-like and hard to chew. Little of the marbling fat will have melted, and the bland proteins will not have broken down into beefy-tasting free amino acids. This is called “bleu” by the French or very rare by us.

Starting at 100°F, the protein molecules start to uncoil and bond with one another, and the connective tissue shrinks. Now both the moisture trapped among the protein molecules in the muscle fibers and the liquefied fat begin to emerge. By about 120 degrees, the water and the fat are flowing freely as delicious juice. So the deepest interior of a thick, mouthwatering steak must be brought to 105 degrees on the grill; it will rise to a juicy 120 degrees after it has rested awhile, as the juices disperse more evenly and the temperatures even out a bit. This is perfection: the meat is no longer jellylike but has taken on only the first signs of grain and has been brought to that narrowest of ranges where the juices have started to flow, the marbling fat is melting, and the protein is breaking down into its incredibly flavorful constituent amino acids, but before the bundles of muscle fibers tighten.

Over 130°F, the proteins coagulate to the point of toughness, as the vertical grain of the meat becomes first distinct and then tight, and more of the moisture between protein molecules is squeezed out, either to evaporate from the surface of the steak or to drip into the fire. This is what is usually meant by medium-rare, and while the meat is still pretty good to eat, it has just passed perfection.

It follows that the outer stripes of light pink, gray-pink, gray-tab, and tan-brown have no gastronomic attraction compared with the deep red and lighter rose layers of meat, and many disadvantages — until we get to the well-done outer crust, which is the most flavorful and deeply savory part of a steak, the lucky product of concentrated meat juices, decomposed fats, free amino acids, sugars, and the famous Maillard reactions, chemical processes that makes well-browned meats among the most indelible tastes in all of cooking. So an ideal grilled steak should consist mainly of two colors: the savory and mouthwatering, crisp, deeply reddish-brown surface, and the just opaque, juicy, red or rosy inner meat on which the heat of the grill has begun its transformation.

All other layers should be minimized.”

– Jeffrey Steingarten, It Must’ve Been Something I Ate

I don’t eat beef, so I suppose I’ll avoid error and perfection in these matters.